Traveling is All About You
Traveling is all about you and no one else. Sometimes people and things can make you feel selfish, guilty, irresponsible and a whole host of other unpleasant emotions. Traveling isn’t always easy and there are certain things you need to accept if you truly want to make this a huge part of your life.
The distance might put you out of reach
When I moved to Buenos Aires, I knew I was isolating myself. How could I not be? I picked up my things and left the Midwest city where I grew up to move my life to another continent. I knew how expensive the flights were and would continue to be. The full day of traveling involved in getting from the US to Argentina did not escape me. Sure, people said they would love to come visit. Countless people said they would be hitting me up for the use of my couch. But you know what?
I knew no one was coming.
It isn’t because I have terrible friends. Quite the contrary, in fact, I just wrote all about how great they are. I knew no one was coming because my friends weren’t going to spend a full day on each end traveling just to see me. You go because you want to see Argentina; having a friend their would just be a bonus. This is not a weekend trip to see some friends and do some quick sight seeing. Either my friends didn’t have the desire to truly see Argentina, didn’t have the means, or a little bit of both. And I don’t resent them for it.
But people will resent you
I hate to break it to you, but it’s true. Some people are not going to understand. They might be jealous. Perhaps they think you are irresponsible. More often than not, they see you as someone who is leaving. I don’t know why so many people have to take other people’s travels as such a personal insult, but it happens.
I spent a huge part of my life in St. Charles, Missouri, which is a suburb only 45 minutes outside of St. Louis. Once I graduated high school, I moved on. I went to school, I moved further into the city. For many people in St. Charles, even that difference of 45 minutes was too much. They couldn’t stand the mere act of “crossing the river” as the St. Charles residents love to say. I am sure you can imagine what happened when I moved to Buenos Aires.
Even if you are only a short car ride away, there are going to be people who simply do not wish to visit you. They expect you to come to them or just forget you ever had a friendship at all.
One night in Las Vegas, as the friends I was visiting drove us back from the strip, having a blast listening to Kanye West in the car. We were tipsy and feeling sassy. One friend got out her phone to update her Facebook status:
I love that the only non family member that has visited us in Vegas came all the way from Argentina. Rease is awesome!
Was it a little passive aggressive? Of course. But it was true. As a traveler, you have to accept that some people will just start to suck. Forget them and keep traveling. This is for you and no one else.
But don’t be an asshole
Yes, you deserve to do what you want and be where you want, but that doesn’t mean you get to forget about everyone else. You can skip out on gifts that are too pricey to ship, but don’t act like making a Skype call on someone’s birthday is all that hard. You are just as responsible for your relationships back home as anyone else. Remember: You move around the world, it doesn’t move around you.
