The Problem with being “Exotic”

What is it with the whole idea of being “exotic” that people find so fascinating and attractive? No one wants to be found interesting or attractive just because of their ethnicity. Of course, that kind of stuff can play into it, but it shouldn’t be the sole reason for anything.

I’m tan. Get over it.

I am from a small suburb where most people wear SPF 50 if they plan to be in the sun for more than 30 minutes. Seeing as I tan easily, never burn and happen to have super dark eyes and hair, I tend to stand out. Of course, America is a melting pot, so people do not usually assume I am too different. However, a lot of people wonder about my ethnicity. I’ll tell you right now- I’m 1/4 Japanese, 1/16th Native American and the rest is the typical American mess of European lineage. My strange Japanese and Native American mix really just means I have high cheek bones, slightly different eyes and dark hair. I could be a wide array of ethnicities. This is the problem.

Guys have a thing for “exotic” girls. During high school, I went mostly unnoticed. Not like weird girl with the stained hoodie unnoticed but, you know, just a girl. However, more than once, a guy found out I was part Asian and immediately found me more attractive. I get it, Asian girls are hot, I’m not here to argue about that, but I’m the first to (sadly) admit that I do not look Asian. I lost the awesome slanty eyes around age 10 or so. So please tell me, why does the mere fact, not physical evidence of my Asian decent result in a couple extra notches on the hot meter?

I now live in Argentina and thanks to my ethnicity mix, I blend in incredibly well. No one would suspect that I am anything from Argentine just by looking at me. In fact, because I learned my Spanish in this country, I can often speak without anyone knowing. It is usually not until further into a conversation that anyone will find out that I am actually American. I cannot tell you how annoying their change in demeanor is. Guys suddenly find me fascinating, ever so beautiful and, let’s face it, a sweet trophy.

I’m proud of where I was born and where my parents were born. However, being foreign makes it difficult to see who is sincere and who isn’t. It was much easier in the States but being here, I am a gringa and people love gringas. Not just guys and not just for dating. Everyone wants to practice their English and I am the perfect person to use. I’m glad to help, but I hate feeling like I am everyone’s conversation partner.

Has anyone else ever felt like being “exotic” has resulted in extra, unwanted attention?

Rease is a US citizen currently living the ex-pat life in Buenos Aires, Argentina. She is bilingual and an experienced traveler. She loves gaining and sharing knowledge of local cultures, customs and adventure.